Wednesday, August 10, 2005

nude dreams

Last week. That's right, last week, I had a dream that not only was I naked at Warriewood Square (the Northern Beaches answer to Fountain Gate) but I sidled up to a posh designer toilet as part of those in-square special displays and proceeded to complete ablutions - all the while yelling at the boys to stop running off and stand in front of Mummy to give her some privacy. I have no idea if this was all just part of my burning and constant desire at the moment to do a wee that lasts more than 3 seconds and is more than 5ml or deals with the whole poo issue with a degree of satisfaction rather than "that'll have to do" or who knows. It was horrifying and yet compelling all the same. Other musings of the moment: - I wonder if my mother ever actually understood the Internet, and actually read this, just how many lemon delicious puddings it would take to a) stop her crying and b) apologise for all the bad bad things I say about her on here. - Is Barnaby really a bad name? - If we called it Lulu would she hate us forever? - I'm hungry, I really need Doritos. - God that heartburn is a bitch, I wish I hadn't eaten those Doritos. - Ah, I've walked three steps so naturally, I need to urinate. - Why does my brother's choice of life and approach to it irritate me so much. I fear I am turning into Holly Hunter's sister on Home For The Holidays. - I wonder if I look fat in this. - Man my back hurts. - Do I really need to do a wee or is that just pelvic congestion. and so on and so forth.


Anonymous Tony said...


At the outset, please let me beg forgiveness for intruding into such a private matter as the name of your child, but I can't help thinking that your oft-mentioned wee deprivation is having some other unfortunate side effects.

If you want your son to grow up as a jumped up little popinjay, or your daughter to mature into a fine specimen of a labrador then I would highly recommened Barnaby or Lulu. However.......

PS: Given that I now know your surname I will also feel compelled to report you to the relevant authorities if you embark on this course of action.

8/11/2005 10:03:00 am  
Blogger Kim said...

Oh intrude away. There is a 'real' shortlist, but we learnt the hard way (ie, it took two children) to hold them relatively close to our chest. This is so to avoid the months of "oh you can't call your child Oscar/Felix" and then when you do, watch them deny UNTIL THEY ARE IN TEARS OF INDIGNATION YOU WOULD ACCUSE THEM OF SUCH THINGS that they ever raised questions on your choice of name. So, we've adopted the Bec/Prof approach of decoys.

Besides, Labradors are SO cute.

8/11/2005 08:42:00 pm  

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